The All Mighty Adila

assalamualaikum~ :)

Last couple of days, I had this one conversation with Mom--

Dependent Women VS Independent Women.

Hmm.. Kalau yang dah lama kenal aku, must have known yang I have a sister. Second child with three younger siblings. But since Along is somewhere better on the other side of the world, now I'm in charge in the 'first child department', as a big sister. And since Abah adalah seorang manusia yang workaholic, Mom taught me everything, on how to take care of myself, BY MYSELF. Abah ada dia punya pegangan where semua orang kena berdikari, sebab nanti kalau tiba-tiba Mak Abah dah tak ada, you can manage yourselves well. Gittewww..

So yeah, I've transformed into this one verrrrrry independent girl, thanks to my parents! Very independent, to the extent yang aku rasa kalau satu hari nanti kalau aku tak kahwin pun, aku masih boleh hidup.

Hmm..

Bila fikir-fikir balik, baguslah kan bila dah jadi manusia tak reti bergantung pada orang lain ni? Tapi bila fikir dalam-dalam, being too independent brings no good to you pun. Like, seriously. Lelaki mana yang nak perempuan yang hidup macam 'uh like I care kau ada atau tak cause I can manage myself' ni kan?

Because you see, I developed some level of ego by being independent. Serius, ianya benar. And for guys, they have their very own ego too. Bila kau perempuan, yang sepatutnya lemah, tapi act all mighty, some guys might even not like it. Because 80% of guys that I've been dating (wah kau banyak boyfriends!), mereka 'enjoy' kebergantungan kau pada mereka tu.

Mom said, she heard about some divorce cases where the wife adalah jenis yang terlalu berdikari sampai suami dia rasa tak diperlukan. Cause the wife has the money and she is used to doing things herself that she never ask her husband on anything. Akhirnya, dia diceraikan. Padahal, si isteri tu tak pernah mintak duit sebab dia tahu yang suami dia ada tanggungjawab lain like, setelkan utilities, sewa dan groceries. Lagipun, she has the money, so why bother. Kan?

Hmm..

Macam aku, Mom and Dad has given me everything I could ever asked for. Aku ada lesen sendiri, and they even gave me my own car. I can manage driving 12 hours non-stop, driving all the way from Shah Alam to Kangar alone, settling whatever business I have all by myself, senang cerita, I can manage almost everything myself. 

Tsk. Aku takut jadi macam perempuan tu. Aku target untuk kahwin lepas aku bekerja dan ada duit sendiri. Aku risau, what if kalau aku dah get used to living alone? Or, kalau pun aku kahwin, macam mana kalau tak reti nak 'lemahkan' diri aku untuk buat suami aku rasa diperlukan? You know, when you have been doing things for you and for others by yourself, and suddenly you have to let others do things for you?

Ugh. Kena belajar jadi lemah sedikit, supaya suami boleh perasan dia hero. Bahahaha! You knowwwww macam lagu Fynn Jamal--

"Aku punya manja kau saja boleh rasa."

Gittewwwww uolls~